Maggie;♥ (truexsweet) wrote,

Title: I Won't Say Goodbye
Chapters: 3/?
Author: truexsweet
Genre: Drama, Angst
Ratings: R
Pairings/Characters: AoixUruha,AoixRuki, ReitaxKai, ToraxUruha
Synopsis: This was different. It was a feeling the honey blonde had never felt before, something that made his heart beat rapidly in his chest, and the butterflies knot in his stomach. He was on edge, his anxiety at an all time high. Uruha was waiting for something, or rather in this case someone. He knew he was in trouble, his hand shaking as he eyed the text message on his mobile phone. He found his lip quivering as read over it again for the seventh time, wanting so desperately to try and deny that it was in fact his lover of five years trying to end their relationship.
Comments: So, most of you guys probably think I disappeared off the face of the earth. Truth is, I died and I was resurrected. Yes, I'm alive and breathing. I bring to you chapter 3. I decided to make this a little longer than just 3 parts, because if I end this way, I think I may be killed in some of the worst *best* ways possible. Thank-you for being so patient with me. As always, comments are love. <3 I hope you enjoy this chapter.

The room was rather dark despite the time. With nothing but him cell phone for lighting, Aoi laid sprawled on his bed, his heart broken in pieces as the memories of the night played in his head. Ruki betrayed him. It was Uruha he should have chosen. Everything he could have ever wanted in a person was Uruha. That’s why he cheated on Ruki. There was something about Uruha that made him happy. He was a better person when he was around him.

Aoi choked as he swallowed back a sob. He knew the fight they had was serious. Aoi knew he was wrong to yell and bitch about Uruha doing the very thing he was doing himself. He knew he was a fool. He knew that more than anything. Even after he hit the other and treated him like dirt, he wanted him back. He wanted to hold him, to feel Uruha’s heat against him. Ruki was nothing now. He hated himself. How could he not see that Uruha was always everything he ever needed?

With a shaky hand, he flipped his phone open, looking at the empty inbox of text messages. Since last night, he’s sent at least twelve texts. He just wanted to talk. Even if they weren’t together, he wanted Uruha in his life. He knew it was selfish. He made the other crack, broke him into a crying mess, making him call for someone Aoi knew he loved dearly. He could remember the event clearly in his head. Those same vivid memories that haunted Uruha every night.
~ ~ ~

“Hey, what are you doing after school?”
Uruha smiled as he tucked his books neatly in his backpack. “Nothing really. I gotta go home and help Mom with dinner. We’re making curry.”

“Why don’t we go get some ice cream? It’s so hot.” It was a simple suggestion. It was late summer. The sun was blazing down on the school. Long, dark strands of ebony hair stuck to the boy’s face as the heat wave was starting to reach them. “Without air conditioning here, I’m ready to pass out.”

“Then you go for ice cream, baka.” Uruha rolled his eyes as he tried to hide his smile. “Besides, didn’t you say you have a date with what’s her face?”

“I told you. We’re just friends. Besides, I think she’d messing around with our teacher in chemistry. I don’t like girls like that.” The boy retorted, nudging the blonde’s arm. “We’ve been friends since middle school. I can always make time for you.”

Uruha could feel his cheeks flushing as he quickly gathered his things. He tried hard to keep that secret grin from the other. He didn’t want him to know. Ever since they were little, Uruha had always had a crush on the raven. He was going to tell him. But not until the time was right. He wanted to wait until graduation. “You’re such a dork. Keep it up and Akira might think you’re gay.”

“Who the fuck cares what he thinks? Just because he doesn’t like spending time with his best friend, doesn’t mean I don’t want to spend time with mine.” Aoi murmured, frowning as he watched the other close his locker. “Please?”

“I don’t know, Yuu. Mom has been acting really distant. She was acting really weird this morning. At least let me go check on her.” There was a serious tone in the blonde’s voice. Over the past couple weeks, something was different. His mother was acting different. He was worried. He knew his father didn’t care about either of them. He was a wealthy business man. His mom was always so strong. It was strange she was crying more often. Tonight was dinner night. Every Thursday they would cook dinner together and watch movies. It was like a ritual they created after his father started leaving more often. He wouldn’t miss these nights for the world. In his eyes, his mother was his everything. “Can’t we go to my place first?”

“Come on, Kouyou. You know the ice cream guy is only there until 4. It’s 3:45. Your house is a twenty minute walk from here. Let’s just get some ice cream and go to the park by my house. Then I’ll walk you home and leave you to make dinner with your Mom. Okay?” Uruha was hesitant, and Aoi could see it. “Come on, Kou.”

“Fine. But after we finish, I want to go home.” There was no room for debate in his tone. Uruha was really beginning to worry. “I’m going to text Mom and let her know I’ll be a little bit late.”

“Okay. What kind of ice cream do you want?” Aoi began pulling money from his pocket as he looked over at other. “Strawberry?”

“Of course.” Uruha looked at his phone. Whenever he texted his mom, she always replied quickly. He watched the time, his stomach twisting at the thought that something serious might have happened. He took a deep as he looked in the direction of his house. “Mom..”

There was something about the way Uruha looked that made Aoi worry. He handed the other his ice cream as he began walking in that direction. “Come on. Let’s go. If you’re that worried, then let’s make sure she’s okay, alright?”

Uruha nodded as he took his ice cream, taking a small lick as he walked beside the other. The walk home was silent, the tension from the blonde telling Aoi everything he needed to know. It wasn’t long before they were walking up to Uruha’s door. “It’s locked.”

“Do you have a key?” Aoi questioned, his brow furrowed as he looked to the other.

“Yeah. It’s just weird. She never locks the door when she’s home. And her car is in the driveway.” Uruha frowned as he pulled a key from his pocket. Slowly, he unlocked the door. His breath hitched and his eyes wide as he looked through the doorway.

“Kouyou, what are you looking a-“ And then it hit him. There was an overwhelming smell of copper that tainted the air. Aoi could feel the vomit crawling up his throat as he walked in. There was a pot of curry on the stove that was simmering, adding to the smell of blood. He looked to Uruha, seeing panic on his face as he looked around.

Uruha was frantic. He looked around, checking the downstairs for any sign of his mother. The smell was getting stronger as he ran towards the stairs. Without warning, he felt his shoes slide on the laminate flooring. There was a dark, crimson liquid pooling at his feet. He could feel his heart becoming heavy as he felt himself fall. And then he felt it. A tiny scarlet droplet dripped to cheek. His gaze immediately shot upright and then he saw it.

“M-Mama?” His eyes widened at the horrific scene before him. At the top of the stairwell, dressed in a white, silk dress was a woman with long black hair and those honey-like hues that resembled his own. She was hanging by what looked like a noose made of rope that was tied tightly around her neck. Blood was dripping from her wrists which looked as if they had been gashed open. Her eyes were unmistakably his mother’s despite the red, bloodshot tone that covered over the whites of her hues.

She was gone.

~ ~ ~

Aoi couldn’t help the tears that fell as he heard that shrill scream that left the blonde that day. After that incident, they never talked again. He didn’t know what happened to him until he found him applying at his company. Uruha had been so angry with him over the incident. He blamed him that day, saying it was his fault she died. If only he didn’t force him to get ice cream. It was something even the raven himself couldn’t help hate himself for. He didn’t know it was going to happen. If he did, he never would have made Uruha go with him.

Of course, that was over ten years ago. But even then, after so many years, Aoi couldn’t help but think all he ever did was cause Uruha pain. He could feel his blood begin to boil as he squeezed his phone tightly. Why couldn’t he make him happy? Even after all this pain, all he could think of was trying to keep him. “When will I stop being so selfish?” He growled, and he threw his phone hard against the wall. The device broke into pieces as his gaze became blurry. “Why can’t I make you happy?” He sounded broken as he buried his face in his hands. He could feel himself choking as he cried, his breathing erratic as he broke down. “Why can’t I just leave you alone?”

~ ~ ~

“Akira, what should I do?” Uruha sighed as he looked at the blonde, holding his phone in front of him. He didn’t know what to do. He couldn’t get Aoi out of his mind. He left Tora’s house and called Reita to meet him at a local coffee shop.

“I don’t know. Shouldn’t you be at Tora’s? Why did you call me, anyways?” Akira yawned as he reached for his coffee, trying desperately to keep himself awake. “It’s like four in the morning.”

“I got a message from Aoi.” He frowned as he turned his phone around, showing the other the message. “He actually left Ruki.”

Reita couldn’t help but look away. He knew exactly what he was talking about. He gulped, looking around, looking at anything to avoid the other’s penetrating gaze. “Oh? I..I didn’t think he’d do that.”

“Me neither.” He murmured, snapping his phone shut. “What do you think changed his mind?”

“I…I have no idea.” The blonde blurted, his inability to lie to his best friend showing clear as day.

“That didn’t sound reassuring.” Uruha’s eyes narrowed as he moved closer. “What aren’t you telling me?”

“Geez, look at the time. I really need to get home. Keiji needs to go for a walk.” Reita quickly stood up, putting his money for the coffee down as he got ready to leave.

“Keiji doesn’t go for walks. He’s a bird.” Uruha’s gaze was deadly as he stood up next to him.

“Does too. Some people walk there birds. He could have been a dog in a previous life. You never know.”

“Akira! Shut up! What aren’t you telling me?!” Uruha wasn’t in the mood for games. “Don’t tell me…did you have something to do with this?”

“No. Kouyou, just chill, okay? Talk to Yuu.” Reita couldn’t bring himself to tell Uruha the truth. “Just talk to him.”

“Some help you are.” Uruha rolled his eyes as he stuck his phone in his pocket. “If I find out you lied, I’m never speaking to you again.”

Reita could feel his heart drop to his stomach. Everything he did, it was for Uruha. He was in love with him. It made him frown as he watched the other put his coat on. He wished Uruha would just give up. He would do anything for his friend. He even slept with Ruki so he would get caught for being the slut he really is. He knew Uruha, no matter the situation, would hate him for that. The idea of a life without the other was one unimaginable. “I’m sorry, Kou.”

“For what?” Uruha cocked a brow as he fixed his purple scarf around his neck. “I wish you’d just talk to me.”

“Everything will unravel. And when it does, remember I love you.” Reita frowned as he turned away from the other. He kept a steady gaze with the ground as left the shop. Whatever was to happen would determine his friend’s fate. He played the role he chose. Now it was time for Uruha to do the same.

I love you.

~ ~ ~

From: Uruha
You still awake? I’m outside.

Uruha paced as he stood outside Aoi’s apartment building. He wasn’t sure exactly why, but somehow it felt right. He looked up at Aoi’s window, searching for any sign that the other was awake. He frowned as he noticed the lights out. He couldn’t build up the courage to knock on the door. “Yuu.”

“Hey sweetie.” Tora smiled as he walked down the street towards the other. He wasn’t sure why his lover was out so late, but he was happy to see him. “You’ll catch your death out here.”

“T-Tora.” There was a sudden nervousness that seemed to sweep throughout the blonde. He felt like he was doing something wrong, like a child who was hiding a broken vase from his parents. He laughed nervously as he hugged him. “I was just heading home.”

“Why don’t we go back to my place?” The tiger smiled as he wrapped an arm around his waist, pressing a kiss to his forehead. “Come on.”

“O-Oh, um..okay.” Whether or not he should be honest, Uruha wasn’t sure. He wanted to go and talk to Aoi. He needed to know how serious he was. He knew Aoi lied. He knew that Aoi hurt him. Even with what happened when they were younger, he’s learned to forgive him. He was in love with Aoi then, and he was in love with him now. But now he brought Tora into this situation. How could tell Tora he wanted Aoi? He couldn’t. He would be doing what Aoi did to him all over again. Instead, he kept quiet. He stared at the ground, unable to look at his boyfriend.

With a soft sigh, he pulled his phone out again.

From: Uruha
This is it, Yuu. If you love me, then here’s your chance. Once I’m past the block, then I’ll take it as you choosing Ruki and I’ll give up on you. Make your choice. It’s your last one. Me or Ruki. Starting now.

With a final glance, he walked beside Tora. This was it. His final chance. Uruha couldn’t wait anymore. Five years of waiting and being let down over and over, it couldn’t happen again. His heart was pounding with each step he took. Time was ticking. His feet were getting closer to the end of the block. It was hard to hide his anxiety as he slowly, yet surely, was reaching the end. The end of the block. The end of him and Aoi.

Why do you always let me down?

He could feel his breathing pattern change as a cool tear slowly made its way off his cheek. He was at the end of block. Nothing. No text. No phone call. Not even a flicker of light from the apartment. Had everything Aoi said been a lie? He reached his hand to hide his face. His shoulders were shaking as he felt his lip quiver. “T-Tora, I’m so sorry.” He cried, his other hand clutching to the tiger’s shirt. “I-I was such a fucking fool!”

This wasn’t about him. Tora’s expression faltered as he pulled the honey blonde against him. He ran his hand up and down his back soothingly, pressing a kiss to his temple. “It’s okay, Kou. I’m here for you. I’ll never treat you like Aoi did. You’re my everything.”

“He said that t-too!” Uruha was trembling as his knees began to weaken. He felt like they were going to buckle beneath him. “He always tells me something, but in the end it’s always a lie! When will he get it through his idiotic head that I fucking love him?! I get it wasn’t his fault with Mom! I deserve for Aoi to hate me! But this…this…is torture.”

“Baby, you need to calm down.” The brunette tried hard to keep the other in place. “Look at me. Everything will be okay.”

Nothing…will ever be right.

“Let go of me, Shinji!” Uruha screamed as he pushed the tiger away, his face streaming with tears. “Nothing will ever be okay!”

Uruha backed away. “Don’t you get it? I’ll never be okay!”

“Baby, please! Stop!” Tora wasn’t sure if the other could see it, but down the road a car was speeding through the alley. “Stop!”

“Don’t tell me what to do!” He was mad. At Aoi. At his Mom. Even Tora who hadn’t truly done anything. He turned away quickly. He wasn’t sure where he was running, just that he was going to get there. “Leave me alone!

“Kouyou! Look out"

Uruha’s eyes grew wide as he saw those flashing lights. His body froze as heard the shrill sound of the horn, only to be followed by the sound of the tires screeching off the pavement.
“Get out of the way, idiot!”

The voice didn’t belong to Tora. Uruha’s head snapped to the side. “Y-Yuu?”

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