Pairings/Characters: AoixUruha, AoixRuki (reference)
Synopsis: It wasn’t fair. There were days Uruha would come home and Aoi would think he was a stranger. Other days Aoi would refuse to acknowledge that Uruha was anything to him at all. It was only Ruki he wanted. Ruki was his lover. Uruha was nothing. Watching the way he idolized Ruki, the way he said he loved Ruki, there was no hope for treatment. Aoi’s memories were blocked and the only way he would ever be happy would be if Uruha let him go. And so he did. He fired Ruki and told him to take Aoi away. After that, he watched him from afar. He made a promise he would never bother him again. That was, until tonight.
Comments: This is something I've been working on for a few months now. I finally finished it today. I hope you guys enjoy it! As always, comments are appreciated. <3
“Hey Uruha, what do you wanna be when you get older?” Aoi questioned, drawing his gaze to the ground. It was early June, the last day for the elementary students, and the raven was waiting patiently for his older brother to pick him up. “I want to be…a lawyer! Didn’t you say you wanted to be a doctor?”
The honey blonde appeared giddy as he drew a heart in the sandbox, almond hues blinking as he looked back. “Yeah, I wanna be a doctor!” He replied with a small giggle. “Do you think we’ll be friends forever?”
“Well, yeah. I mean, I love you. You’re not my best friend, you’re my bestest friend!” The raven said, drawing a heart beside the other. “The bestest friend I could wish for.”
“Doof.” Despite his tone, Uruha wore the biggest smile. As long as he had Aoi, that’s all that mattered. No matter where life took them, they would forever have one another.
“I can’t wait to grow up.” The raven chimed, taking Uruha’s hand in his own. “It’ll be perfect.”
~ ~ ~
There was a chilling air that seemed too swift throughout the city, the cool late autumn breeze making the man shake as he walked. A faint outline of white forced its way into the air as the male released the smoke from his lungs, his ebony locks flowing freely as he made his way to his apartment. For some reason tonight was different. Something about the atmosphere was off. “Does something feel different to you?”
A laugh could be heard by the short, petite brunette that walked beside him. “You’re just paranoid, love. It must be the weather. It’s been exceptionally cold these past few days.”
“No Taka, I feel like I’m forgetting something.” Aoi murmured, his chestnut hues falling on a building that they were about to pass. “Today…it’s the 11th.”
“Yes. October 11th. What about it?” Ruki looked over at his lover, a strange sense of curiosity coming from within his gaze. “Every October you go through this. Maybe it’s time we see a therapist.”
“I’m not crazy!” The taller man retorted. “It’s nothing. Forget I ever said anything.”
“Let’s just get upstairs so I can make you a nice cup of hot cocoa.” Ruki said, taking the other’s hand in his own and leading him to their home.
With a subtle sigh, he nodded, following the brunette with a strange sense of insecurity. “Okay.” He whispered, his gaze lingering to the building as they passed. Whatever it was, he was going to find out.
“Ruki, I’ll meet up with you in a little while. Can you start boiling the water? I’ll be up in a few minutes.” There was something about the way his chest felt, that tight clenching that knocked the raven off guard. A cold sweat began to form tiny wet beads as he looked to the building through fear filled eyes, the feeling of terror sweeping through him.
“You need to stop tweaking out, sweetheart. You’re not going in that building. It’s blocked off for a reason.” Ruki retorted, pulling his lover along. He didn’t like the obsession, the tense nature in the other’s tone, or the look of fear in his eyes. It seemed like a horror movie of some kind, and if the situation played out like one, Aoi wasn’t coming back. “Let’s go, sweetheart.”
Aoi was frozen in place. From the building window, there was an image of a man. He couldn’t make out the face, only noting certain features the more the person exposed himself from the lighting that was beating down from one of the lamp posts. The look in his eyes was dark and unnatural, but the smile he wore was welcoming. His body began to move on its own accord in the direction of the man, his arm pulling away with a roughness that took Ruki off guard.
“A-Aoi? Where are you going?” It was unusual for Aoi not to listen. Ruki was always a possessive lover and it was extremely rare that Aoi would ignore him and go against his word. He could feel his grip on the raven thinning and he didn’t like it. “Yuu, stop! We’re going, now!”
“Shut the fuck up!” He screeched, slapping the brunette hard. His palm began to tingle from the sharp movement, and his eyes watched as the other’s cheek began to swell in perfect unison with the red hand print that was left from the blow.
For a moment, all Ruki could do was stare in shock. Aoi wasn’t violent. Not only wasn’t he violent, but he never acted so coldly towards the younger. His eyes narrowed, his own palm colliding with the raven’s jaw. “D-Don’t ever fucking touch me!” He cried, and his tone was loud enough to draw attention from people who were passing by.
“Is something wrong?” An old, polite woman asked, worried for the safety of the other. “Sweetie, is this man bothering you?”
“F-Forget it.” Ruki’s voice came out shaken as he backed away from the two, his eyes narrowed at Aoi. “Aoi, come home when you get your head out of your ass. Actually, don’t bother coming home.”
Aoi couldn’t believe it. All in the matter of a moment, he lost his lover and his home. He looked at the grey, brittle woman, shock clearly written all over his face. “D-Did he just kick me out?”
“You bet your ass he did!” The woman yelled, hitting the raven with her silver metal cane. “What are you doing hitting young boys!”
“He’s as old as I am! He’s not a young boy! He’s just short!” Aoi cried, bringing his arms to cover his face. “Stop with the beating already!”
“Is something wrong here?” The voice was a man’s, deep and unfamiliar. The woman stopped with her strikes and looked to the stranger. “Mrs. Yamada, what’s going on?”
“Dr. Takashima, this man was beating up a poor innocent child.” She said, hitting Aoi with another strike. “He is quite abusive.”
“Why don’t you go home and let me take care of him. You’re a beautiful, elderly woman who needs her beauty sleep. Don’t waste your energy on someone like him. You’re much too pretty and fragile to overwork yourself.” The doctor’s voice was smooth as he picked up the grocery bags that were dropped in the heat of the fight, and he handed up them back to their rightful owner. “Have a good night, Mrs. Yamada.”
“You’re such a doll, doctor!” The woman said happily, her demeanor changing in the matter of a second. She took her bags and sent a final kick to the raven before starting her journey home. “Goodnight, doctor.”
“Goodnight.” He waved, and then his eyes were immediately back on the man who was cowered in fear. “I have to admit, you really have a way with words.” He reached his hand out to help the other up. “You pissed off the town’s oldest woman and lost your lover. What does that tell me about you? Not good things. Nothing good at all.”
Anger began to boil as Aoi slapped his hand away. He got up on his own and looked back to the building, only to look back and realize that the doctor who was standing before him was the figure who was watching him from the window. “Y-You’ve been watching me this whole time?!”
“I’m not a stalker. I was never watching you per say, I think that’s a little conceited.” The doctor’s nose scrunched in disgust by the other’s ignorance. “Besides, I wouldn’t be acting so rudely if I were you. What’s your name?”
Aoi glared. “Look at you being all high and mighty. You’re incredibly two faced if you ask me.”
“But I didn’t.” The other responded. “I asked your name to be exact. Don’t have one? I’ll give you one. Idiot.”
“W-Who the fuck are you to be acting like you’re amazing shit?!” Aoi couldn’t believe this guy. “If you really need to know, my name is Aoi.”
“Aoi? Nice to meet you. My name is Uruha. It’s not much of a pleasure to meet you, but we’ll leave it at that.” Uruha sighed as he leaned against the light post, crossing his arms as he watched the other idly. “Now that we got that out of the way, do you need a place to stay?”
“W-Why would I want to stay with you?! You’re an asshole.” Aoi dusted the dirt off his jeans as he moved away from the doctor, not liking the air about him. He seemed like a jerk, and Aoi was tired of dealing with them. It was too much for one night. “I need to go home. Goodnight, doctor.”
“Goodnight, Yuu. The last time I checked, you didn’t have a home. Not anymore.” The doctor replied coolly, a treacherous tone in his voice. His demeanor was eerily dark as he turned away, his white lab coat imprinting a permanent image in Aoi’s brain. The name was different, yet familiar. It was terrifying.
As much as Aoi wanted to leave and forget this night ever happened, there was something about Uruha that made the raven want to know more. It was like Uruha knew him, but nothing was registering properly. Why did Uruha act like he knew him? Why did he call him by these names? Whatever the answers were, Aoi needed to know. “Look, I’m sorry. Can I please stay with you?”
He’s such a fucking idiot. Uruha thought, feeling his headache coming back. He rubbed his temples as he began walking towards a luxurious black Porsche. A melodic beeping could be heard as he pulled the keys out, hitting the ‘unlock’ button. “You have two seconds to get your ass in the car. Otherwise, I’m leaving you and you can sleep on the street.”
Aoi quickly picked up his pace and made his way to the car. He looked at in awe as he ran his fingers over the new black paint, eyes glowing as he reached the door handle. He peeked into the car through the window before he opened the door, and his eyes grew wide by the plush purple interior. “Purple?”
“That’s it, I’m leaving you.” The honey blonde growled, turning on the ignition.
“No, no. I like it.” Aoi assured the other as he quickly slid into the passenger’s seat. “It’s really nice. My favorite color is blue, but the purple with black is very cool.”
“I have a thing for purple. And…” Uruha pointed to the sun visors. “Butterflies.”
Aoi’s eyes grew wide as he noticed the beautiful butterflies that were stitched to fabric on the visors, finger tips running over the embroidery. “Really pretty. It’s feminine.”
“Are trying to say something?” Uruha snapped defensively. “I like girly things, got a problem with it? God, I shouldn’t have picked you up.”
“Look Kouyou, I didn’t mean anything by it. I think it’s neat. Stop snapping at me and drive the damn car.” The raven replied, resting his head back from exhaustion. He curled his index finger in his long, ebony locks, swirling it around in an attempt to ease his anxiety. Ever since he was a child, it was something he’d always done. His coffee-like hues kept a steady gaze out the window, watching the river as they reached a bridge.
Water…so much water…dark..dark..I-I’m lost..I..
A sudden wave of excitement and sadness swept over the honey blonde. “Yuu, are you remembering me now?”
Aoi looked at Uruha fearfully, his body trembling as the car made its way towards the water. Although the car wasn’t close to it, it was enough to make tears flow from his dark eyes. “S-Stop the car!” He screamed, his arms moving to shield himself as if they were about to crash. “STOP THE FUCKING CAR!”
Immediately, Uruha parked the car on the side of the road. He unbuckled his seat belt so he could motion closer to the raven, hands reaching to pull his arms away from his face. “Aoi, you’re okay.” He said softly, trying to be as gentle as possible. He could feel how tense Aoi was and a frown began to form as he watched the other shake. “The water is down there. You’re fine. It’s okay.”
“I-It’s going to get me!” Aoi cried, trying desperately to push Uruha away. “Get off me!”
“Aoi, you need to listen to me! You’re okay!” Uruha whined, and then he slapped the raven hard. And for a moment, the other fell silent. “Aoi, listen to me. As long as I’m here, you’ll be safe. Okay?”
Aoi couldn’t remember why he felt this way or where the sudden fear came from. His arms reached around the other and he held on to Uruha tightly. “P-Promise?”
Uruha nodded against his shoulder as he rubbed his back soothingly. “I promise. Now let’s get back to my house so we can sleep for the night.”
“Okay.” The raven said, moving to curl up on the passenger seat. He closed his eyes as he felt the car’s gear switch into drive. He took in quick, shallow breaths as they drove over the bridge. The only thought that raced through his head was fear. He was afraid of the dark abyss, the chilling water source below them. It was like it was a monster lurking in the depths of a closet. Only monsters weren’t real. The water really was.
Uruha remained quiet as he drove, his palms sweaty as he kept a tight grip on the wheel. There were questions he wanted to ask and comfort he wanted to give, but the look Aoi wore told him that the idea he had in mind wouldn’t go over smoothly. “We’re almost there.”
A mumbled “yes” could be heard from the raven as he sat upright. He watched as the city scenery began to change. The bright city lights were beginning to die down and soon the only thing that was surrounding them were trees and large estates. It was obvious by the area that all of the families were wealthy. He couldn’t see the exact layout of each house, but if it weren’t dark, he was sure they would have looked just like they do in magazines. “Is your house as big as these?”
“It’s decent I guess.” It wasn’t long before Uruha was pulling into his personal drive way. He looked over to see Aoi’s maple gaze locked on his house. He looked astonished. “Aoi?”
“S-Sorry. I’ve never seen a house like this. Are we even in Japan anymore?” Aoi asked, clearly mesmerized. He opened the car door and stepped out of the vehicle, making sure to wait for the other to join him. “How long have you lived here? Do you live alone? Is this your parents’ house?”
“You sure do ask a lot of questions.” The other snorted, slamming the car door upon exiting. He ushered Aoi to the door, not wanting to stand in the cold for much longer. “Let’s get inside. I have work in the morning, you know.”
“S-Sure.” Aoi said, following closely behind. “I don’t mean to be a nuisance. I’m not used to this.”
“This?” Uruha’s expression fell blank. “What do you mean?”
“This is awfully elaborate. Are you like a lawyer or something?” Aoi asked curiously, “Or like a –“
“Doctor.” The blonde muttered, opening the front door. “I’m a family physician, but I handle mostly children. Please stop asking me a hundred and one questions. I’m too tired for this.”
“R-Right.” Aoi quickly walked in, trying his hardest not to comment on the interior décor. Everything looked extremely pricey from the huge fire place to the couch, to the designer curtains and furniture sets. It was obvious the other had money and a lot of it. “You’re rich. Wow.”
“Fucking stop with the comments! Okay, I get it. You’re a fucking poor ass country boy. Not everyone lives your life style. I live this one, you live yours. I don’t ask about yours, you don’t ask about mine. Understand?” There was annoyance in Uruha’s tone as he slumped into his usual cream recliner, leaning back in his final attempt to relax. “Look, the guest room is upstairs. It’s across the room from the bathroom. Leave me alone and sleep.”
“O-Okay.” Why Uruha was so frustrated, Aoi didn’t know. He chewed his lip ring out of nerves, taking the advice to leave the other’s sight. He walked up the marble staircase, fingers grazing the dark iron railing as he looked around. There was a tan swirled wallpaper that caught his interest as he looked to the top of the stairs. He found his legs moving quicker as the butterflies fluttered in his stomach, an unexplainable excitement coming over him like a tidal wave. “Beautiful.” He whispered, the familiarity almost frightening. He continued his walk until he reached his designation and once he reached the door, he stopped.
A small click could be heard as the raven’s hand turned the doorknob. A groan escaped him by the strange jiggle it took to open the door. “How many times do I have to ask him to fix this?” He growled, slamming the door behind him. He stomped to the bed with a scowl and then for a moment, he caught himself. Why did he say that? He never met the other in his life. It was happening again. Those strange dreams, had they meant something? He held his head as he took a seat on the edge of the bed. “What..is wrong with me?”
~ ~ ~
It wasn’t until Aoi left that Uruha had calmed down. He felt like an idiot. He never should have brought the other here. There was a reason he told himself that he would never bother him again. Watching the flashbacks was painful. It always led to the hope that one day Aoi would get better. But he wouldn’t. He never did.
Leaning back in his chair, Uruha sat dumbfounded. As a doctor, he knew that Aoi’s memories were as good as dreams. They were nice, but they were easily forgotten. He was easily forgotten. A thin line of moisture formed as the honey blonde sulked. How could he have been so stupid? Aoi was in a car accident almost ten years ago. For four years, Uruha tried everything. He struggled day in and day out to help his lover. He had to teach him everything all over again. Reading, writing, even simple tasks such as eating and using the bathroom were a struggle.
Over two years, he remembered how to do things again. He remembered school and his mom. He even went as far to remember his childhood cat. He began to remember everything, everything except him. Even if it weren’t the case, the pain that he wasn’t important enough to be remembered broke him. But it wasn’t just that…then there was Ruki.
Ruki had worked at one of local home health centers. Uruha had known the other for years. He often referred his patients to him, knowing well that the people he cared for were taken care of. Just like his patients, Uruha asked the other to help him with Aoi. Ruki didn’t hesitate. He seemed happy to help. Uruha depended on Ruki to help Aoi during the day when he worked. He even went as far to have the younger move in to help with other things in the house. If anything, it limited Aoi’s progress. As much as Uruha tried to make him remember, it always seemed like Aoi’s faith was in Ruki.
It wasn’t fair. There were days Uruha would come home and Aoi would think he was a stranger. Other days Aoi would refuse to acknowledge that Uruha was anything to him at all. It was only Ruki he wanted. Ruki was his lover. Uruha was nothing. Watching the way he idolized Ruki, the way he said he loved Ruki, there was no hope for treatment. Aoi’s memories were blocked and the only way he would ever be happy would be if Uruha let him go. And so he did. He fired Ruki and told him to take Aoi away. After that, he watched him from afar. He made a promise he would never bother him again. That was, until tonight.
Uruha sighed as he turned the lights off downstairs and made his way to his room. He walked slowly, making sure to pass the guestroom on his way. He peaked in. A small smile forming as he saw the raven’s sleeping form. He looked beautiful and at peace, an expression that even now was still carved into his brain. Maybe now that Ruki was out of the picture, he would finally have a chance to help Aoi remember. “I won’t fail you this time.” He whispered, dropping his gaze to the floor. “I promise I’ll make you remember.”
With a soft sigh, he walked to his room. There would be more opportunity to try and talk tomorrow. Right now, all Uruha needed was sleep. Still, somehow he knew that this time would be different. Without Ruki in the picture, he knew he had a chance. He smiled as he threw himself on his bed and with the flick of the lights, he was off to sleep.
To be continued~